this is my heaven at night;

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"I originally created this blog for people to get a reality check on the person I was; how I felt day in and day out, my thoughts, inspirations, and the states of my ultra sporadic moodiness. The shit I liked or people I love; sometimes even, the things that I despise. I wanted someone to hear me, hence the name. I’ve come to the that I’m lying down with only my thoughts and the faint buzz of an old AC unit tantalizing my sense, that none of that matters to anyone but me. Afterall, we’re all doing the same thing. Everyone wants to be heard but is too goddamn busy in the consumption of themselves, that they would never pause for a moment to listen, or even try to understand someone else’s state of being in their lives. When a person does sit down to get a feel for you, is it ever really sincere? —or just a temporary fixation? Are they really seeing where you’re coming from? —the answer is and always will be a bluntly stated and wholeheartedly truthful, NO. You can say that you empathize, or you “feel them” but you never really do, nor will you ever. Unless you are in a first person narrative reliving every moment in someone’s life that has lead them up to where they are and who they are at this direct moment in time, you’ll never really understand. That’s why we all have a little monster screaming inside, at a pitch so intense it sometimes makes us cry. —and no one else can see it, but they still question why, when they themselves have their own little monster eating them alive."